The Shadow of Feminine Devotion
Jun 26, 2023
The shadow of feminine devotion:
“I hope I can change his heart through my love.”
The shadow of devotion is something often experienced by women in the feminine community, who are already doing work on embodiment and union.
On the surface, it looks and feels like love.
You do whatever it takes, to take responsibility for your feminine beingness.
You actively surrender to your man and his lead.
And it all feels so in alignment, until...you slip into the shadow of over-compensation.
You believe for every argument and disappointment in your relationship, you are here to take the responsibility and work on yourself.
"What else do I need to do to heal?"
"Why can't we hold onto those moments of deep love, even after all the excruciating heart and womb work I've done?"
Then...secret resentment.
"Why isn't he fighting for me, and for us?"
The shadow of feminine devotion comes from our deepest core need for Him.
We. Need. Him.
However, when this need is not coming from a healthy and fully conscious place, it becomes a shadow.
To overcompensate, and to overtake responsibility for what only he can initiate and change, is a subtle, and more sophisticated form of feminine control and self-shielding.
“If only I work on myself more, he’ll come around” comes from “I need you to be this for me, and I will do whatever it takes to pursue you to give it to me.”
Including betraying your own feelings and true desires.
Including compromising on your values.
including sweeping all the warning signs under the rug, because it is way more painful for you to acknowledge this unmet need in you, than to act as if all things are peachy, and you are simply being devotional.
Over-compensation is a protection mechanism. Our inner woman does not feel safe to be fully seen, cherished, and desired, because she hasn’t met those desires within herself.
There are father and mother wounds at play here. We mentalize and strategize, rather than *somatize* and BE - the embodiment of love and devotion.
As little girls, if we did not receive the energetic imprints of the Lover from our mother's wombs, we often grow up and become our men's mother, savior, or, martyr.
This is a deep invitation to step into your WOMAN – the embodiment of the Lover.
Can you bring your full intimate presence and approval to see, acknowledge, and hold all of her and her yearnings without stories like “why are you so needy” or “let me go take another program to distract myself from feeling vulnerable this way?”
Being a devotional woman is not a thing you are here to conquer. Or a performative to-do list.
Devotion is the commitment of coming into the right relationship and deep intentionality with: Your woman. Your body. Your yearnings. And HIM.
